In the past six/seven months, we've both definitely grown and we had to learn some hard lessons. I'm so glad we got married when we did though- learning these lessons and growing together makes our relationship mean so much more to us than if we had waited until we were both out of school and had careers to start our little family.
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| Our family, taken 1-10-15. Note the baby sleeping right between us. Parenthood is fun. Especially when the child is covered in fur! |
The hardest one (that I think we're still being taught) is patience. Before we got married, we went apartment hunting and wanted to go ahead and get everything established so we could move in as soon as we got back from our honeymoon. Blake wanted/needed to get away from the job he was working and I was trying to figure out how to get a car. Well. We ended up not getting a few job opportunities. We both were getting frustrated, as we were living at his dad's house and were ready to get our own place and really start our life together. There was interview after interview, but no job. I didn't get it. But then, it's like everything just clicked. We learned that there's a reason he didn't get those other jobs- the job he has now is such a perfect fit for both of us. He's making such great connections with the attorneys and he's really getting a chance to show them what an asset he is to the firm. As much as we thought we loved some of the places we looked at in Smyrna, we found the perfect place for us. The second we walked in it already felt like home. A blessed path for me to get a car was opened up, and now everything is just floating along.
We had to learn that what God's plan for us is not necessarily what we think we want the plan to be or what it should be. We can't dictate timing. We have to wait for his timetable. It's been such a humbling experience.
Personally, I've learned to be secure in our relationship. I mentioned in an earlier post how for a long time I was very insecure in our relationship. I would have minor anxiety attacks whenever I was alone- "Is he complaining about me to his friends? Does he think I'm just awful? Is he not with me right now because he's tired of me?" But now I know exactly how he feels about me. I know how he shows love. I don't have to have some grand gesture worthy of a Disney movie to know how he feels about me. I've learned it's about the little things- him surprising me with Subway after I mention that I'm craving it, or getting a back massage after a long day cleaning. And when he's at work or class and I'm home alone, I'm not scared. (Well, ok, I do have recurring nightmares/daydreams of people breaking in or a murderer coming and killing me or the cat getting out... But I don't fear for our relationship.)
We've also learned the value of friends and family. Starting out as both students, we didn't really have a lot. But our family and friends have all really come through to help us in whatever ways they could. Whether it be just standing beside us at the wedding or giving us a sofa or coffee table, we've been blessed beyond measure. Even when we first got engaged and there were some who decided not to be our friends or support us, both of our families have really stuck by us. (BTW, funny story. There were rumors that I was pregnant and that's why B proposed.. Well. Over a year later and I'm still waiting on that baby!)
But seriously. We would not be where we are without the support of our families!
Side note: This has absolutely nothing to do with anything I have said, but it's such a cute story I just couldn't resist telling. Last night after showering, Blake was in the bathroom shaving and Addy ad I were hanging out in the bedroom. When Blake came back out he was playing with Addy doing his little tickle thing that she absolutely loves to her. I mentioned how we had been hanging out having girl time and he called it "mother/daughter time" and it just melted my heart. It's so cute to see how Blake's relationship with Addy has grown. When we first got her, he agreed more because of me than his own wanting. He thought she was cute and all, but cats have never been his obsession like they are mine. (Which is why we have the whole deal that since I got a cat we will get whatever kind of dog he wants. Right now, we're thinking it will be an Old English Sheepdog. And we will name him/her Ambrosius after the dog in Labyrinth, which he so kindly forced me to watch one night even though it gave me nightmares of Bowie in tight leather and goblins...) But anyway. After we had had Addy for a couple nights, I asked him if he loved her and he replied with "I guess". But Since then, he has proved that he really truly loves her. It's so cute. He's even starting to change his opinion on cats.
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| Is this not totes presh?! This is him cuddling Addy right after she got a bath :) So sweet and tender! *Le Swoon* |
It makes me all excited to start having kids :)
Anyway.
Seeing how much we have grown and learned together in just the almost seven months we've been married makes me so excited to see how much we will learn in the rest of our forever together!
What's the most important thing you've learned from a relationship? I would really love to hear!!
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